There is so much going on in the beginning of creation. Man and woman making poor choices and God figuring out a away to still let them live. There are so many questions that don't really need to be delved into to a certain extent and some of course that are worth asking, but in the end it eventually will lead back to you asking yourself, "Did I create the heavens and the earth?" and if your answer is yes, then well you don't believe anyway. That was a tangent. Sorry.
What I was trying to say was this:
God gives us consequences because He loves us. At least during that time before we are able to see the big picture, which eventually we see and he shows his insane love for us in giving His Son. Ok still tangent-ing. Back to it, disciplining because He loves us. That is a simple concept, I discipline Amaris and eventually our son because I love them. It's not always easy; maybe why that's why parents don't discipline, but I know it's good. I know it will help them develop into better people, but I always hope to do it in a loving way which helps them understand there is something better.
All of that to say, it is crazy what happens after the forbidden fruit:
[16] To the woman he said,
“I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing;
in pain you shall bring forth children.
(Genesis 3:16a, ESV)
Now obviously if you are a woman, well then this sucks. It sucks for guys too, it's just not the pain part. It's more in the watching pain and all those crazy things. But God doesn't just give us the pain in childbirth. There is more going on here.
He makes women need to wake up about 543,803,408 times per a night to pee as well as "hold" their bladder throughout the day because He loves us (well us as in women). Because even for those people who do not take care of themselves the way God intended, it helps women develop the muscles necessary for childbirth (the pushing part). This is a beautiful thing, this is grace being shown to us. It could be that the pain is insane and there is no help. That is not God. There is help, it is shown in the months leading up to having the child. God does not leave us alone. He never intends for us to go at it alone. The other beautiful thing about getting up so many times during the night is pretty simple, it prepares you for the 15 feedings per a night (not really 15, if you are feeding your kid 15 times, email my wife and I, we will help you give you a plan, at least a sort of plan).
Monday, January 10, 2011
Thursday, January 6, 2011
personal written wedding vows
I am mainly putting this online because it can be pulled up from anywhere and possibly a guide for those of you who are (wisely I believe) writing your own. My wife and I decided to write our own and sat down for a multiple hour session and brainstormed what we wanted in them.
My wife is a bit of more gifted writer, so she did a little bit more than me in organizing our thoughts. In the end we decided to have the same beginning couple sentences, different middle, and the same final sentence. For some reason that makes sense to me to have the same beginning and ending and it helped having some commonality as well.
Vows are something that are incredibly deep. CS lewis often talks about how it is like losing a limb to break them, probably worse. I believe that's a pretty accurate representation. Another reason divorce is so brutal. There's a lot that can be said about that, but I don't want to go that route today. Vows are much different than promises. We use the word promise loosely in our culture, they are never vows. Marriage vows are something I think ends up being deeply rooted in who we are for the duration of our lives.
The vows themselves as I read over them always make me tear up. No way around it. More than anything in marriage we are called to change, or maybe not change per se, but rather get better. I can read these and see very clearly how we both need these things from each other and it is something we are committed to working at/on for the duration of our lives. Of course we fail, we are humans, but that's not it, we have vowed to do something and that commitment is what the vow looks like in the end. So here they are, maybe they are helpful, maybe not, but they are something we will do for the rest of our lives. First mine:
I take you, Jocelyn to be my wife,
I make this covenant with you,
before God, in marriage to display his grace through my unconditional love and commitment to you for the rest of my days on this earth. In my commitment of love to you, I vow to:
Put you second only to the Lord. Through God's grace,
I will be patient with you as you grow.
I will treat you with gentleness and not let the sun go down without resolving conflict.
You are a woman to be praised because you fear the Lord, and I will encourage you to seek Christ always.
I will be lionhearted and lamb-like as a leader in how I protect you and honor you in the decisions and choices I make.
I will be faithful to you and never leave you or give up on you, regardless of the difficulties we may face.
Jocelyn I will view you as a chosen daughter of God, holy and righteous, blameless in His sight.
Then Jocelyn's:
I take you, Jonathan to be my husband,
I make this covenant with you,
before God, in marriage to display his grace through my unconditional love and commitment to you for the rest of my days on this earth. In my commitment of love to you, I vow to:
Put you before anyone else on earth and put your needs before my own.
I will remain faithful to you. I will serve you and wash your feet as Christ did for his disciples.
I will trust you, respect you and support you in your role as my head and the God ordained leader of our household.
I will encourage you in your walk with Christ.
I will praise your strengths and share in your joys.
I will always forgive you, and hold no record of wrongs against you.
I will be patient with you and allow you to grow.
I will never give up on you or us, regardless of the difficulties we might face.
Jonathan I will view you as a chosen son of God, holy and righteous, blameless in His sight.
My wife is a bit of more gifted writer, so she did a little bit more than me in organizing our thoughts. In the end we decided to have the same beginning couple sentences, different middle, and the same final sentence. For some reason that makes sense to me to have the same beginning and ending and it helped having some commonality as well.
Vows are something that are incredibly deep. CS lewis often talks about how it is like losing a limb to break them, probably worse. I believe that's a pretty accurate representation. Another reason divorce is so brutal. There's a lot that can be said about that, but I don't want to go that route today. Vows are much different than promises. We use the word promise loosely in our culture, they are never vows. Marriage vows are something I think ends up being deeply rooted in who we are for the duration of our lives.
The vows themselves as I read over them always make me tear up. No way around it. More than anything in marriage we are called to change, or maybe not change per se, but rather get better. I can read these and see very clearly how we both need these things from each other and it is something we are committed to working at/on for the duration of our lives. Of course we fail, we are humans, but that's not it, we have vowed to do something and that commitment is what the vow looks like in the end. So here they are, maybe they are helpful, maybe not, but they are something we will do for the rest of our lives. First mine:
I take you, Jocelyn to be my wife,
I make this covenant with you,
before God, in marriage to display his grace through my unconditional love and commitment to you for the rest of my days on this earth. In my commitment of love to you, I vow to:
Put you second only to the Lord. Through God's grace,
I will be patient with you as you grow.
I will treat you with gentleness and not let the sun go down without resolving conflict.
You are a woman to be praised because you fear the Lord, and I will encourage you to seek Christ always.
I will be lionhearted and lamb-like as a leader in how I protect you and honor you in the decisions and choices I make.
I will be faithful to you and never leave you or give up on you, regardless of the difficulties we may face.
Jocelyn I will view you as a chosen daughter of God, holy and righteous, blameless in His sight.
Then Jocelyn's:
I take you, Jonathan to be my husband,
I make this covenant with you,
before God, in marriage to display his grace through my unconditional love and commitment to you for the rest of my days on this earth. In my commitment of love to you, I vow to:
Put you before anyone else on earth and put your needs before my own.
I will remain faithful to you. I will serve you and wash your feet as Christ did for his disciples.
I will trust you, respect you and support you in your role as my head and the God ordained leader of our household.
I will encourage you in your walk with Christ.
I will praise your strengths and share in your joys.
I will always forgive you, and hold no record of wrongs against you.
I will be patient with you and allow you to grow.
I will never give up on you or us, regardless of the difficulties we might face.
Jonathan I will view you as a chosen son of God, holy and righteous, blameless in His sight.
Monday, January 3, 2011
windows
It was a busy weekend for the most part. Good busy, in seeing family and the joy, that I have come to love, of sauerkraut of new years day.
Home improvements are always "fun". And only fun when they are finished. They obviously need to be done in some capacity. America is weird in that way, but there is something good about pride of ownership and taking care of what you have been given. So on Tuesday, my very gracious cousin, who used to work on windows for a living, came over to help (and when I say help, I mean do everything) install a window. It didn't go super smoothly and took way too long for sure. The good thing about it was it gave us a guide for the next windows.
So yesterday we were able to install two. He did the second window in Amaris'/baby room. In the meantime, I managed to take out the window out of blind luck for the most part...And
then got some guidance in taking out the frame part.
Took out the inside molding pieces...
And finally gave it a chuck into the front lawn.
And then Chris in record time put in the window...
It was a good time in general and it felt like I actually learned something. Added something in the repertoire of home upkeep that I hope to be able to pass down one day. It is always an amazing thing to see how specialized our society is. I could never install windows or do A/C or put in a door, but if you take the time it's really never rocket science. Additionally, it got me thinking that I wish I would have taken the time growing up to learn how to work on cars. My dad would have taught, heck I think he tried, but I always ended up "rushing" through life and never having enough time. Now I wish I knew. How will I spend the rest of my years. Hopefully not as rushed.
Anyhow, It was a good time hanging out with Chris and getting the job done. 3 down and 3 to go. Our room and bathroom and then when we get some more money, the basement. It is amazing what difference can happen with a few windows.
Home improvements are always "fun". And only fun when they are finished. They obviously need to be done in some capacity. America is weird in that way, but there is something good about pride of ownership and taking care of what you have been given. So on Tuesday, my very gracious cousin, who used to work on windows for a living, came over to help (and when I say help, I mean do everything) install a window. It didn't go super smoothly and took way too long for sure. The good thing about it was it gave us a guide for the next windows.
So yesterday we were able to install two. He did the second window in Amaris'/baby room. In the meantime, I managed to take out the window out of blind luck for the most part...And
then got some guidance in taking out the frame part.
Took out the inside molding pieces...
And finally gave it a chuck into the front lawn.
And then Chris in record time put in the window...
It was a good time in general and it felt like I actually learned something. Added something in the repertoire of home upkeep that I hope to be able to pass down one day. It is always an amazing thing to see how specialized our society is. I could never install windows or do A/C or put in a door, but if you take the time it's really never rocket science. Additionally, it got me thinking that I wish I would have taken the time growing up to learn how to work on cars. My dad would have taught, heck I think he tried, but I always ended up "rushing" through life and never having enough time. Now I wish I knew. How will I spend the rest of my years. Hopefully not as rushed.
Anyhow, It was a good time hanging out with Chris and getting the job done. 3 down and 3 to go. Our room and bathroom and then when we get some more money, the basement. It is amazing what difference can happen with a few windows.
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