Wednesday, April 29, 2009

providence

When I was in my younger teens, I mowed the lawn pretty regularly and also mowed my grandparents. We had a riding mower and it took about 2 hours and some change to finish it up and then another hour or so to do my grandparents for which I used a push mower.
The push mower I often used was our own and one day I carelessly filled it up with gas and it wouldn't start. Hmm. The "Dad" calling began and he eventually showed up. It turns out I hadn't push gas in but a gas/oil mix that is suppose to be used for the weedwacker. I cant believe weedwacker is actually a word.

It ruined the mower. Well it needed to be fixed at least. In the meantime we bought and new mower and it has been sitting ever since, and it was a pretty new mower back then. Now that I have a house, with a lawn, the push power will be coming back out. Fortunately, I ruined one about a decade ago that is now ready for our house. So the ceremonial (pulling of the cord) first mow will be this weekend. I must say I am pleased it all worked out. I ruin a mower so that I can use it multiple years later. That, most certainly, is providence.

In other news, we will be away for most the weekend on our second anniversary. And will also be preparing our baby room for a few hours on Saturday. Who would have thought, a year after our first anniversary we would be preparing for another member of the family. Life changes quickly.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

PS

I added the National Geographic Photographs gadget because these pictures are almost always fantastic.
So, Jonathan says I'm supposed to blog today. Well, he said yesterday, but I just didn't get to it. What to blog about...hmm....

Oh, the only recent news, I think, is that the news is public at work. I was prepared for it, and was either going to tell people this week or was expecting it to just sort of get out this week, so all is well. One of our managers asked Kim about it Monday, and I told Kim he was allowed to give a truthful answer if someone asked him...so Tuesday morning the congrats began. Not sure why I'm so shy about it, sometimes I'm excited and like to tell people, but at work...work is that weirdo environment where you kind of know people, but really don't know people, so sharing such personal news feels almost invasive or something. The last thing I felt like (feel like) dealing with is having to walk out on the production floor and having people stare...too many grungy guys out there that give me the creeps on an average day, let alone now. But oh well. I don't go out there often, and especially won't now because the fumes from the machinery and adhesives and dyes are nasty and surely can't be good for the baby. This place has air quality akin to that of where we live in the city. It is entertaining to see who comes in to comment on it and who just looks at me funny and doesn't want to say anything. So many rumors fly around here that I guess some people might be hesitant to say something because there's been no notarized announcement or something.

I don't have much else to say...I've been sort of emotionally drained all week and don't have much of an explaination. Things are going well, I have nothing to complain about. Maybe it's just sort of the fallout from having such a stressful week last week. I could've sat by a lake this week, hiked around and not talked to a single person and been fine. Contemplative mode? I don't know. Just ready for some downtime and alone time and time where being pregnant and planning life doesn't dominate who I am. Not that it always does, just been spending a lot of energy lately on those 2 areas and not enough time otherwise. I guess it's time spent on talking about those 2 areas...constantly explaining the baby story this week at work, and the moving story, all that stuff. A balance that needs to be struck now, or I'll never strike it.

At least it's getting nice out...ready to go to the beach.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

one year 11 months and 13 days and 20 hours19

The hour will be changing as people read it but right now its around 1:30 which means one year, 11 months, 13 days, and 19 hours ago Jocelyn and I read our vows to be married.

Crazy.

First of all, its only been almost 2 years. That is astonishing. Absolutely insane. Those classic sayings of "you feel like you never knew life apart" are very true. And to be honest, things keep getting better. We've been working at it for a while and now the Lord thinks it time (well in about 5 months) for us to have a kid. To add another dimension to the equation.

He is right.

Not only because he is right all the time, but because Jocelyn and I are getting better at this. Maybe even a little cocky at being married. Well maybe not being cocky, but we are getting better at it. Either way, marriage is great. The sweet can't be understood without the sour, but the sweet certainly outweighs the sour exponentially. Yes, exponentially.

So this new "X" to the equation will be something absolutely crazy. And whether it's a boy, girl, amaris, ravi, or Nani's personal favorite, Magnolia (dont worry we decided against that name but I just had to mention it), it will be part of the equation. At times the baby will be the equation, but overall we will learn to add this new dimension confidently into our lives. And when I say confidently, I really mean scared to death at times.

Confidently.
This will be an awesome addition to our lives. Better than we could have imagined I am sure and a part of our lives that we probably never remember not being there. I am quite glad to have family around to share in the joys of a new child. For more than just the baby sitter part, but because we will get to share life together in new, meaningful ways. And let's be honest, being able to go on date night because the baby sitter is a mile way is an amazing perk. The Lord orchestrated all of these steps quite well. It was fun to be at counseling together for the last time in a while because of the chance to reflect where we were over a year ago.
Something like this.....

To something like this...
Sorry, they are just in the way sometimes. She's pregnant.


That was not suppose to be crude and I am not thinking about that, but the picture was just too funny.

Anyway, now that I have ruined this post. I will continue in vain.

I love my wife. We have grown figuratively and now are growing literally, in number.

Scared to death at times.
I am not sure I need to say a whole lot in reference to this and having a baby. They are small. I know they dont break, so that is a good thing. Well at least not easily. Having people around makes the transition much easier and more enjoyable as well. I cannot imagine doing this expansion without clear and present help. Thanks family.

We are going to raise a good little boy. (or at least keep trying until we have a little boy)

Sunday, April 19, 2009

an active little boy (or girl)

The latest theory that is completely nonsensical is that the baby is an active baby (no, not add or adhd).
For example, every time Jocelyn sits down from doing something active he seems very content, happy, and as soon as Jocelyn sits for a second, the movement begins. More importantly, on a bike this can be seen through actual graphs and charts used by Jocelyn's bike computer (speedometer for all of those who dont know the lingo).

When Jocelyn is going fast and moving along well, Jocelyn's heart rate goes down, which of course is indirectly the baby's fault since he is quite at home with speed and movement.

This is science people, we have graphs to prove it.

But the most important part of this theory, is seen when we stop. Jocelyn's heart rate goes up. Yes, up. It's hard to believe (remember, graphs). Relaxing annoys the baby who in turn starts to move around in hopes to do something active and of course indirectly makes Jocelyn's heart rate go up.

Science.



(By the way, we own a new house. yipppppppppppppppppppppeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. YES that was necessary)

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Step two...(or 5 who knows..)

Jonathan had his second interview for a math teaching position at Allen High School this morning. Looks like the administrators could see how superfantastic he is and he essentially has a job offer! Retiring teachers do not complete their "paperwork" or whatever until later in the school year, so while they have a declared "retiree" the position is not officially posted, so they couldn't officially give him anything to sign...all this officialness. But it will be posted soon enough, and when it is, it is HIS! Yay! My husband is amazing and its SO nice to not have to worry about his ability to get a position teaching..he's just that good that if they didnt hire him, I'd question their sanity. So, one of the many steps in moving to Atown is coming to completion.

We most likely will have settlement tomorrow....oh oh! Didn't update on the significance of that. I think we blogged abit about it, maybe not...breif recap: Last Friday, Good Friday, we get an email from our broker informing us that we didnt get our mortgage loan approved because the house (according to that specific lender) was in an area of "enhanced decline" (as if the entire country isn't!) and we had to put more money down in order to qualify...like $16,000 more. Right, we'll just uh, reach into our little piggy bank and pull out our spare change to come up with that. Needless to say, we were a bit stressed and could not quite figure out a grand solution. After many talks with our broker, she offered us some hope saying she could go to a different lender she had some "influence" with and could try to get us the loan we wanted with the rates we had planned on. Monday, the negotiations began...so there was a bit of back and forth and supplying documentation of this and that, then yesterday, we had the last step. They had to do a comparative survey of properties within a mile of that house in order to decide if they would approve the loan and accept the appraisal the other lender had provided (the other lender's appraisal came in at MORE than what we were buying the house for-that's pretty fantastic). We weren't expecting to hear about this until today late afternoon..but after a day of nail-biting and praying incessantly, we got a phone call around 530 or so from our ecstatic broker who told us the loan was approved and we could pop the champagne. If ONLY I could drink champagne! Actually, if i could've, a massive amount would'v eprobably been consumed during the period of time BEFORE we got the approval to deal with the stress!

ANYHOW... we are approved and can hopefully settle tomorrow. The only way we cant is if the Title doesn't get finished today. That is just not even a concern in our book after having to deal with the "Real" problems.

So..that is that. Good progress in our journey for sure. Now we can return to battling for our $5000 deposit we should have had returned to us. BUT at least we'll have the energy to fight now and a few good things to look back on.

Ok, PHEW, well, I will now finish my lunch and hopefully digest it before I go riding.

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

PROOF! I AM GROWING....

at 8 weeks...

at 19 weeks.... (mind you, this "pop" only happened about 2 weeks ago at most..)



Regularity sometimes

One of the beautiful things about being married is having some regularity in life. Going to bed at certain times and eating and certain times etc. Now to some people that may be boring and some days most certainly is, but it is something I value much more than I have thought is boring...much much more. Now that I have made no sense at all, or at least wrote a very confusing sentence, I will continue.
This regularity also comes with positive and good eating habits, as well as a healthy eating wife. Jocelyn and I both have been in good shape this past year and in large part to just eating regularly (and non dutchy foods) as well as exercising. So now that she is pregnant, she is still fit, but is growing and there is nothing she can do about it. Yesterday, I had to laugh because of how much she has grown in certain areas, but remains pretty much normal everywhere else.

Having a baby is weird.

Not only is there a being inside of a being, but it also just takes over your body. It needs room in the uterus and needs milk and needs and needs and needs.

This is not some crazy shock to see this happening, but it is amazing how quickly someone can grow and she is soon going to pop. She is already starting to.

My wife is as beautiful as ever.

Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Learning by shopping...

Well, I guess I'm not the one "shopping" necessarily, just making the list. Creating the registry has been quite the learning experience. It's kind of exciting, I have to admit that...I'm still scared and in disbelief and shocked and all those things, but I guess as the pieces of this new picture of life come together I am starting to see how it all works and therefore, it's not quite as intimidating. Yea, I'm sure I still cannot possibly imagine what it's like to birth a child and have a hundred sleepless nights in a row, but at least I am confident that I can pack up a stroller and put the right size clothes on the kid. At about this time last year I had to go to Target to shop for baby items to make a shower gift basket for a work event. I remember my boss calling to see what I had found as I was in Target, and I just stood in the middle of the isle and said I had no idea what on earth I was supposed to look for. No idea what wipes to buy, was stunned by the various sizes of diapers I had never considered, and completely confused by the gazillion kinds of bottles that exist. At that time, I thought ok, pick up cute things and whatever, I'm not going to have to deal with this for a looooong time, thank goodness! Now, I'm sitting here adding items to our Target registry fairly decisively. Yay for learning, I guess.

Spring has always been a favorite time of year for me, and summer, summer has always been run-around-hike-swim-beach-ride time. It's been semi-depressing to think of spring and summer this year...as my riding mileage won't exactly "increase" and Jonathan and I won't be literally running up the sides of mountains in Maine, but I finally convinced myself to do some more reading on exercise and cycling during pregnancy today. Unfortunately, I have a doctor who is rather by-the-book when it comes to heart rate maximums and all those things. I'm not a pro-cyclist and am not a "machine", but typically have a higher fitness level than most, so I don't think I fall into the "Traditional" bracket of pregnant women who should adhere to these strict stipulations on heart rate and such things. Still, I get quite scared when I see a high number on my HR monitor if I'm climbing a hill, and would feel terrible if I did something to cause a problem with the baby.

Looks like, from reading, the women who encounter problems-which generally means that their uterus shrinks or refuses to expand-are those who push as hard or harder than they did before pregnancy. They don's curtail their training at all. For some reason, our culture glorifies those who seem to defy natural human limitations and do ridiculous (oh, we call them "extraordinary") things while pregnant. What a mental mess...so we think it's cool when women do triathalons and continue to race and stuff while they're carrying a baby...geez, they're essentially super heros, right? On the other end of the spectrum, I don't think that life has to end and they must quit riding entirely, I guess I just dont understand how they can selfishly risk the health of their baby for whatever their pursuit may be.

So I'm caught in the middle of the cultural superhero biking/running mommas-to-be and the overly cautious "I'll take a complete vacation from my sport" ones. And, because I've been taught (culturally speaking) to value productivity and always work hard-whether it be a job or an atheletic pursuit...or just plain healthmy brain fights against calling the cautious ones "slugs" How messed up.

Anyhow, I'm not even sure where I was going with all of that...I guess just assuming the blog style of "journaling" for today, as I read through these articles and resolve to pursue my sport in a balanced, safe and un-mythical way for the next several months...separating cultural values and vain glory from a humble acceptance of something (someone really) coming before the activities I enjoy, or something like that. I wish we lived in the Lehigh Valley already...riding would seem at least a bit safer then, outside of the chaos of the city streets where we currently live. I think we escape the jaws of death at least 1 out of every 5 times we ride along Hunting Park Avenue in traffic. Thankfully, people in the city more often just run their mouth than actually do something to back up their talk...so we basically just get yelled at by motorists who don't understand the law and who are not content riding in the left lane on a 2 lane street. Then again, we experienced similarly inconsiderate parking lot drivers at Target in Allentown this past weekend.

Ok this is turning into a rambling mess. But AT LEAST I wrote...it's been awhile, and things have been stressful...I tend to not write in stressful times so the whole world doesn't have to share in our stresses and dramatic events of buying a house and such things. Not much else going on it seems....the past few days I've had trouble with food, ug...just certain things, like teriyaki chicken we ate last night...haven't thrown up, and it's not like terrible terrible nausea, just annoying litlte bouts of feeling "ick" as this baby grows. It IS growing by the way, my family has officially said they see a bump. Soon enough, those pregnant mother parking spaces will be mine. YES.

Monday, April 13, 2009

moving...

...this has nothing to do with houses thankfully. We keep apologizing for our lack of blogging so I wont do it again.

Anyway, the baby is moving. Not necessarily visible to the eye, but Jocelyn can feel it. And I have also seen her stomach look lopsided. Always quite odd to see a stomach that is not proportional. I do think I have ever actually seen a lopsided stomach until now. Which makes me believe that there really MUST be a baby in there or a miniature alien or gnome or something very small.

That was suppose to be funny.

Sorry.

Moving along, Jocelyn has been doing well and un-sick, again praise the Lord for that as that is a real blessing not only for her, but for me as well. I think we already have enough clothing for quintuplets as the nani and abuela have been running rampant at shopping for baby clothes.

Ooo, ooo, ooo, before I forget. We have a baby registry. You know you want to get us something. Go to target.com and find our names through the gift registries link. There are quite a few options to get there so all should be well. The name of our registry is "Jonathan and Jocelyn Little One" and in case you were unsure our expectancy date is September 27th and we are from Pennsylvannia.