If you want the details of how it all went down...

I'm so amazed at how God works outside of our expectations and creates better situations than what we can imagine for ourselves. When they told me I was scheduled for induction, I was glad the end was in sight but sort of upset. The anticipation of the surprise moment when labor begins is just fun...and even though we had gone through the week of being past-due and were becoming almost indifferent to "waiting", we were still sort of disappointed that there would be no surprise and we had an official date set for this birth. Turns out, I'm SO GLAD it worked out this way. We got to enjoy our last night "alone" together Monday and Tuesday morning as actually fun...waking up knowing what was going to happen that day. Plus, I think it put me in a sort of "surrender" mode and made me much more flexible. I wasn't "set" on a natural delivery...just wanted to see how far I could go naturally and experience the pain because well, it's just part of it right? Knowing I was to be given pitocin I had mentally prepared to have an epidural because I knew there was a possibility for some unnaturally intense contractions, at least from what I had heard. My docs turned out to have a great perspective on inductions-take it super slow and don't create an artificially intense situation. At any rate, I was much more open to, actually was counting on, the epidural, instead of being determined to hold it off as long as possible.

My nurse was superfantastic, I had met her earlier in the week actually during some non-stress testing. Had the perfect balance of historically working with midwives but bridging over to the hospital setting, so she was a great match. Pitocin started at 815 am and progress, regarding dilating, was pretty slow until they broke my water around 1-1:30 (I think this is what time it was???). Throughout the morning I was allowed to do yoga, sit on a birthing ball, walk around as far as my cords would let me, etc. We worked and breathed through contractions as they grew. Contraction just before water breaking was minor....contraction immediately following water breaking was ridiculously more intense. So crazy. They say that's what happens...I just wouldn't have believed how drastic the change was without experiencing it for myself. They just got increasingly intense from then on, and rapidly...the monitor just looked like a bunch of waves with no breaks in between. They dropped my pitocin level, which was already very conservative, but by then I had realized that I was not interested in going through this pain for what could potentially be several hours. Since things had been moving slowly all morning, I figured I could go on like this until late that night, which just didn't seem sustainable for me. I was already on IV because of pitocin so I opted to try Statol (no idea if that is spelled correctly) first, which was supposed to "take the edge off." Well, I felt like I was half asleep, which was sort of entertaining, but it doesn't do much to help with pain from contractions. They intensified and I decided to call in for an epidural since the anesthesiologist isn't always available right away. Fortunately, she came up within like 20 minutes. The Statol was a great help here..I HATE needles. I've always dreaded an epidural, even when I said I was never having kids. The statol had me so drugged up in the head that it took away the anxiety and allowed me to just focus on my breathing to steady myself through contractions while they did the epidural. Again, the nurse was amazingly helpful here, and the whole process went off without a hitch, even through some major contractions.

The drugs took a bit to kick in, and then they had to add more here and there because it wasn't working in one spot (not a huge deal, but I figured hey, you wanna fix it and make me comfortable, go right ahead!), but wow..am I glad I decided to do that. Went from the pain of contractions to being able to relax a bit and just putting up with constant shaking. I got the epidural around maybe 3ish? I was 4 cm dilated at that point. They checked me at 5 and I was 9cm. Guess that's why they had to beef up the epidural dose...transition happened nearly immediately and I am sure I would have lost my mind in pain if I hadn't have gotten the drugs right then. It was really the only window of opportunity I guess in retrospect. My doc came in at 530, declared me 10cm dilated, and we started the pushing around 545ish....after a few minutes of "practice" pushing, I figured I may as well give it all I had and use my fitness to get this baby out ASAP! Jonathan got to help out by holding one of my legs/feet, which he was glad for. 25 minutes of hard pushing later, Amaris showed up and amazed the world with her unanticipated size-and sex.

All in all....again, I cannot complain. No screaming , yelling, freaking out-before or after the drugs kicked in. Everyone was calm and helpful. What an amazingly smooth pregnancy and delivery, and so far, awesome recovery. God is gracious. And now we have this "little" girl...I said when we came into the hospital a girl was my prediction, my doc said the same. But it was still a shock to learn that this baby was, in fact, a girl. The "odds were against" such a thing..from 25 years with no girls born on my maternal side, to 3 out of the 4 new Ruiz family babies being boys, it was pretty surprising to have a "she" show up. I think the moms (grandmoms) were pleased to not have to deal with the name "Onyn." Just wasn't meant to be!

Anyhow..time to go prepare to go home. Quite ready for that, this room is a boring place after so many hours. Ug. And its pretty exciting to be taking home our little "Padawan" (sorry, we are in a serious Star Wars phase right now...) and beginning new life as a family of 3 instead of 2 and having a human baby instead of only cats. Thanks so much, everyone, for all of your support and for sharing in our joy. Seriously, much of our own joy comes from seeing how excited everyone else gets and how a little baby lights up the world for everyone around her. It's a wild thing. If you're in the area and want to stop and meet Amaris definitely go for it. Maybe we'll try to keep up blogging again now that we'll have more exciting pictures and stories than "oh we're still waiting." !

The Waiting Game

Well...we're still waiting. Which sounds obvious because our "due date" is still a week and a half away. It's just such an ambiguous due date I have little confidence in its accuracy. And then even if it is "accurate", it's not like someone comes and knocks on my uterus asking the baby to make his way out on that specific date.

ug. Up until now, Jonathan and I have both been pretty good at just letting this take its time, come as it may, etc. Now that the "signs" are showing up and really the only "Sign" i'm still waiting for other than the actual contractions would be my water breaking-everything else has either happened or is in full progress-it's tough to just sit here and think hmm...how is this going to go down. I'm not nervous or anxious, I think I'm just becoming rather impatient. We're in that phase now of going to bed at night knowing we won't sleep much because every time I wake up I wonder and Jonathan either consciously or subconsciously wonders if its because I'm having contractions or because I have to pee for the 300th time. I don't know which little "pains" and cramp-feelings to pay attention to and attempt to time and which ones to ignore so I don't get excited....sheesh. Guess we have to somehow go back to being sort of apathetic and just letting things happen in their own time, trusting that we'll just "know". My next doctor appointment is scheduled for next Wednesday morning. MAYBE we'll at least go before then...our new friend Shemicka Asom from our small group study at church is a nurse in the "baby unit" at our hospital, and she works today during the day, so it would be nice to go today! Staci reminded us that Logan is still routing for the baby to arrive on his birthday, which is this Sunday, which would also be fun.

ANYHOW...that's all for now. Still hoping this will be the last post before the "birth announcement" but WHO KNOWS! :) Time to work on patience...

Likely the last...

This is likely the last post before this baby arrives, or at least we can announce labor has begun. 37 weeks and 3 days. I decided I should take a few last pictures of prego world (glad to be leaving this stage behind!) and added some of the nursery as well, since it's essentially finished.

I've gained about 35 lbs, whether the rest of the world notices it or not (aside from the bump), I do, and I'm ready to return to "normal". Ug...35 extra pounds on a bike is quite noticeable. The most I can hope for is that riding will feel amazingly easy once it's all gone! I will be able to climb small hills without knowing they're hills and hopefully be able to tackle large ones and just be familiar with the pain. Ha. No major swelling...my feet are still my feet, my hands are mostly the same, though I did take off my wedding band and engagement ring and am wearing Jonathan's engagement ring instead. I do not enjoy the feeling of rings being even the slightest bit tight, so his has been a relief. No stretch marks! Wohoo! At the beginning of this pregnancy, I realized that stretch marks were a likely possibility and simply unpreventable, so I resigned myself to the fact that it could happen. Needless to say, I am quite happy that they never showed up.

I guess I still look fairly normal from the back...which may be why I get shocked expressions when people walk past and then happen to turn around. Certainly not normal from the front...
The nursery is just about complete, aside from a few finishing touches like the wall above the crib, adding some fun pictures, etc. Oh, and a rug.

Little bookshelf to house the "library" we developed thanks to everyone who attended the baby shower. My mom sewed the valances. Rocking chair is essential of course...we went the route of using a classic old wooden one we inherited from family friends instead of the $500 gliders we've seen at Baby's R Us (though they do look quite comfy!).

Every child's room must have a rocking horse of course! My mom found this one at a yard sale. can't quite see it...but we also put a toybox in here that I had when I was a little kid. this room is an eclectic mix of "memorabilia" and modern necessities I guess.

This is our awesome mobile that Adam brought back from Kenya for us. Seriously, is this not THE coolest mobile you could possibly have? And it even fits with the "jungle friends" theme of the bedding. 3 Tiered mobile...I still can't get over this thing.

Crib...hamper...pretty self explanatory. Happy little jungle animals.

Ikea dresser with the changing pad. Hanging up are the slings my mom got us-she made the green one. The wooden calendar hanging on the wall was a prize that Jonathan picked out at our family reunion Bingo game. I haven't completely put it together yet, but it's a fun addition.

So, we are set. Not featured in the pictures are the stroller, pack and play, etc, which are also ready to be used. We even put the carseats in this week, that felt bizarre. I have this fear of carseats being insanely complicated, but was glad to learn that they've either been simplified over the years and aren't that difficult, or I was just living under false assumptions. Either way, it wasn't that hard to figure out, though...it's weird having them there, especially when we're throwing bikes in the back and it's not quite as easy to fold seats down!

I have a doc appointment at 11:30, so I guess I'll post any news from that if it's important. Otherwise, realistically (since we just don't blog much!), the next post will probably announce whether this baby is a boy or girl and have more entertaining pictures from his/her arrival.

maybe there is something wrong with me...

This was not me. Just wasn't. It was more like wow, this is going to change things, but never scared (take note this also wasnt jocelyn, she had a few choice words).
As great philosopher's of my childhood, DC Talk, once said, "Now we come to the pay off."

DC talk by the way looked like this back in the day...
Now, as in about 10 years ago, they looked like this...
Sorry, getting back on track. "Now we can come to the payoff." As in now, we are coming to the end, or beginning, depends how you look at it. So I was not scared when I first heard about the baby. And now, as we go into this final month, well a little over a month, heck this blog will serve me until we get into the final month and I'll feel compelled to write again, but as I said as we go into the final month, I feel less worried than ever.

Actually, I don't feel worried at all. It seems normal or as some may say natural. I feel as though something is wrong with me. Am I suppose to feel disconnected, afraid, and scared of the responsibility. Well I don't. So ha. Well not even ha...Just, this is going to be great. In a truly awesome way. We did by the way go to the hospital the other day for our "tour":

They showed us a powerpoint and we learned a few things then got the see the various rooms we will go into. I must say, it is EXACTLY what I always imagined. Maybe I remember being born or something, (I do have better photographic memory than jocelyn who couldnt remember where the bike shop was today...love you sweetie or as some may say schaweetie!), but truly the delivery room, hospital area all "looked" how I thought it would look. No surprises there, just more excitement for me and then boredom as we went from one room to another. There will be no boredom once it begins!

Boy or girl, it is going to amazing. I guess I cannot believe that there are dads out there who would not want to see their child be born. The odd thing is, I think that is my greatest concern, the delivery, not so much for me or queasiness, but rather for Jocelyn and all the pushing she has to do. I must say that is probably my greatest "worry" or something along those lines. And breastfeeding as well. Also, as a husband I get quite confused as to why some dad's see the breasts as less sexy because there is a baby nibbling on them. I think it is a pretty simple distinction between when breasts are suppose to be sexy and utility. I'd like to think of a witty analogy but I have been writing for way to long. But as Yoda would say, "search your feelings" and you will know it to be true.
Furthermore, as a dad I am just excited to be around the baby and learn more about life. With each new experience, comes well, new experience. The baby's room is ready, so bring on the baby!

O, o, o WE HAD AN AMAZING BABY SHOWER! IT WAS AWESOME, thanks again everyone! you guys rock! It was quite funny, Jocelyn walking in going, 'huh' (even though I didnt see it) and me going "what?!? I knew it but not at all" Again thanks much!

In other news, our cats are enjoying the new house and I do believe that they wish they could go outside and one day may even try, but let's hope not, but in the mean time, they are doing this:
More in reference to the squirrels and birds outside that taunt them. Also, just for fun:
Continuing on, I hope Jocelyn gets this...
Actually, I don't at all, it looks unsafe and looks like it is hurting the kids neck for crying out loud!

Lastly, are baby will be beautiful and amazing and a gift from God, and well, more than I ever could have imagined. But just as I can recognize my wife's beauty, I also know that the baby will probably look like an alien (yes it will mom), but at least we will be able to laugh at it:



Lastly, my wife is awesome. What a champ she has been, and how fortunate we have been to not have any complications!

Final normal doctor appointment...

Well, normal frequency anyhow. As of now, I see the doc every 2 weeks until we hit 36 weeks, then its every week. This means we are nearing the end. (!). How bizarre! I can't quite wrap my brain around the fact that in 8 or so weeks, a little human baby will be in our house. It's just too weird. I'm not exactly getting nervous, I guess it's just a strange feeling of reality settling in. Until now, it's been a sort of distant thought because we've gone through the busy months of buying selling the houses, moving, settling in, vacation, etc. Now, it's 2 months of just pure waiting, or something akin to it anyhow. I surely don't have much else going on. Jonathan will start school in a few weeks so he'll be semi-occupied with that. Otherwise, no distracting events on the horizon. Just waiting to get the last details into place before the baby arrives.

It appears that guesses on gender are nearly split down the middle in the family. I think both sides are secretly routing for a girl, since it's been 25 years since a girl has showed up on my mom's side, and all the other pregnant cousins in the Ruiz family are having boys. My cousin and his wife had their baby last week, which we thought would be a girl, but it was a boy. So "the pressure is on" to break the boy-spell in the Rohrbach clan and birth a girl. I'm nervous to have a girl, honestly. Those reasons may be fabrications in my brain or just the reality that little girls are a handful, but I'm still sort of hoping for a boy though I think I'm setting myself up to be disappointed. Well, not disappointed, that sounds terribly selfish to have an opinion on the gender of my baby...but you know. It will surely be the most spoiled little girl ever, so we'll have to work double time at making sure she's disciplined and doesn't become bratty! At least everyone seems to like the girl's name, contrary to the popular opinion on the boy's name.

I guess I have to count kicks now. This seems ridiculous, as most of the things they've made me do so far...I swear, the stupid hoops you must jump through with the medical world just to have a baby. So stupid. and we wonder why healthcare costs are through the roof-they keep adding ridiculous "necessary" procedures! Anyhow, the kick-counting particularly seems ridiculous because at this point, I'm pretty familiar with this baby's "habits" and it's rather active, so I would notice if an entire day went by without any movement. I mean geez, there's not a lot of room in there so I do notice every little foot and elbow that's moved as it situates itself "comfortably". So yea, two times a day, I have to pay attention for 2 hours and record if there are less than ten distinct movements. I'm lucky if I remember to pee in a cup the morning of my appointments, so we'll see how this daily assignment goes.

I received my first massage ever yesterday, which was specifically tailored to pregnant mothers. Quite relaxing. I could probably use a massage once a month when I'm NOT pregnant because my back muscles just become disasterously knotted, so they're especially a mess right now. It was nice to have those loosened up a bit. Apparently my feet are the most stressed out part of my body, which I am not surprised by other than the fact that there's no visible swelling, really no swelling of any kind in my legs or feet. I'm quite thankful I've been spared that. Of course, it could still happen in these last couple of months, but so far, nothing. Guess I drink enough to cleanse my system and avoid retaining a lot of water?

Anyhow, that's a brief update for now. Not much else new...

30 weeks...

...is a lot of weeks. Let's all give Jocelyn a round of applause for an amazingly easy pregnancy thus far...

....woooooooooooooooooooohooo
....goooooo teeaaaaaaaaaammmm
....yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
...yippppppppppppeeeeeeeeee.....

I must say it has been quite easy to have a pregnant wife. It's almost confusing after hearing all the difficult pregnancy stories when we haven't had anything really happen. So that is something to be thankful for.

At this point in the pregnancy I am ready for the baby. For multiple reasons:

Impatience
I need to learn to work on my patience, but I am just ready for the baby. I would also like, for Jocelyn's sake, for her bowling ball that is front of her body to be gone.
dsa
Surprise
I needed more "points" so instead of impatience, I can't wait for the surprise of this baby. Boy or girl? Hmmm Jocelyn often refers to it as "he" so maybe it is a boy. And if not, she will still be a good mom. In addition to the desire to be surprised I just am excited for whatever it is. Onyn Luis or Amaris Helen, we shall see.

Excitement
Wow! This is excting, we are about to have a baby. It is going to be fantastic. We are about to be parents. Our house is all set and the room is ready! As awesome as it has been to have cats, yeah I know it's sad, I know it will be an infinite amount of joy more to have a child. Callicky or not, it shall be great.

In other news, my pregnant wife is quite sexy.

vacation

wow, so last vacation without a baby i guess. camping seemed so simple this time. next year i have a feeling it won't exactly be "simple", however, we won't get bored at all. it'll be fun having a little human to teach things to...see the wonder in their eyes, all those sorts of things.

at any rate, this baby has had quite the "in utero" experience with cycling. first night we arrived we went out on bikes to explore the area. next morning happened to wake up at 5am and decided to ride out to an overlook point to see the sunrise. very much fun. plus, we were at the beach by 8am and enjoyed the solace that comes with an unoccupied shoreline. we left by 1130 because the crowds closed in on us and just ruined the magic of being there without any company other than dolphins. since we started that day out so early, we had the whole afternoon to entertain ourselves with nearby attractions, including Jonathan's childhood favorite (and his dad's i think!) "Funland." Now, first year we were married and went on vacation here, we had a huge conflict over playing boardwalk games, wasting money, etc etc. Clash of values and how we grew up...what else happens the first year of marriage? anyhow, we've developed a habit of throwing spare change and small bills into a piggy bank, literally-well, now that the pig's ear broke Jonathan bought a fancy jar that counts the change for you...but before that it WAS a real piggy bank. the piggy bank change is used for fun on vacations/daytrips. so a few rounds of the "Funland Derby" AKA "The Horse Game" were already funded. I enjoyed beginner's luck and won a "medium size" horse on my first try. Jonathan came around later on and won a white one as well. So now we have horse siblings that will um...sit somewhere in our house and freak out our cats I guess. they HATE the horses. They're still terrified of the Jumbo sized one we brought home awhile ago (won at the previous trip to that boardwalk but it lived at my mom's for the past 2 years). I guess it is the size of a 3 year old at least...maybe 5 year old.

(jonathan's early morning "pose")

the horses. and jonathan's aviators. whoa.

anyhow...hmm...yea that was tuesday. eventful. just fun to have a bit of friendly competition and enjoy doing silly things together. wednesday we slept in a bit-EVERYONE stays up so late at this camp ground! so weird. at least to us. usually...we camp at state parks or national parks. these campers have an agenda-and it involves waking up early to hit some trails or whatever at full force. people do NOT usually stay up super late. cape henlopen, we learned (though its common sense) is the beach-variety of campers who stay up until all odd hours of the night, children and adults alike. so with the early morning tuesday, and staying up late with everyone that night, we were tanked and slept in wednesday. spent some time at the beach and then went out for dinner at this amazing little mexican place in Lewes. somehow, the fact that DE is full of history, Lewes in particular, did not dawn on us until after we at dinner here and found ourselves wondering through a cemetary with gravestones from the 1600s. there were some prominant early political figures buried there, which was interestin to learn about and just think about. kind of extended the "Independence Day" theme contemplating the crazy time these people lived through and the immense amount of courage and passion they had.


We also determined on that dinner trip that I must learn to play poker. i hate gambling, betting, whatever...complex reasons that extend beyond "Christian Morality." has more to do with the socioeconomic impact it has on so many, but i needed to know. so a trip to Rite Aid proved successful and we came back with a set of cards. our piggy bank of change served as chips. and the lessons began. we took a break and went mini golfing at some point as well, which was quite fun. i won. yes. i did. its my secret talent. not really, i just had a small baby helping me win. it was fun regardless.

went for a rather long bike ride this morning-return trip was fully into the wind of course as we were traveling towards the coast. my legs (and entire being essentially) are quite tired, but it was good fun and i'm just thankful to be able to continue to ride and do physical activities even though i'm getting rather large and moving along in this preganancy. i think our waitress at the diner we stopped at for breakfast thought i was sort of insane wearing cycling knickers and a work out top, not to mention riding a bike, but o well. at least i burned off MY omlette. sheesh.

actually from our first day there....when we went out in the evening to explore.
looks uncomfortable, but i felt great for the most part.

well..we're home and unpacked. and i'm wiped out. more pics are on facebook. i just tried to find some that fit the paragraphs above. peace out.